Well folks, we’re rounding the home stretch of 2015 and it’s been a blast, so Artie wants to close out the year with a bang.

Yes it’s true, for the first time you our loyal (if not attractive)e audience can get in on the fun with a chance to win not only a trip to NYC to see Artie and the crew record a show but a few G’s of Artie’s cold, hard cash.

Here’s how it works:

  1. Sign up with the form at to register yourself to win.
  2. The site will give you a personalized link to share with as many people as you can.
  3. On Halloween, (10/31 for our less well-read listeners) we’ll take a look-see and figure out who got the most people to sign up, and that superfan will INSTANTLY win $3,000 & a trip to NYC.
  4. The person with the second most sign-ups will win $1k and a trip to NYC
  5. The person with the third most sign-ups will just win $1k.
  6. The person with the fourth most sign-ups will have the most in common with Artie. After a lot of hard work they still have nothing…


  1. How do I share the link?
    1. Any way you want to. Post it in a tweet or on Facebook, send it in email, start your own website/podcast/etc. As long as what you’re doing isn’t illegal and doesn’t reflect poorly on Artie it’s cool. (Nigerian Princes, stay home!)
  2. How do I see how I’m doing?
    1. You have a dashboard at where you can see how many times your link has been clicked and how many sales it’s made so far.
  3. When is the deadline?
    1. 11:59pm Pacific Time on 10/31/2015. This contest will end then, though there may be more fun to be had in November.
  4. What do I get with my trip to NYC?
    1. Airfare and Hotel. Artie would have let you stay with him but we’re afraid you might accidentally see Dan bathing him. Suffice it to say you’re best off in your own space.
  5. When does the prize money get awarded?
    1. We’ll pick the winner on December 1st. You little shits who thought “oh, I’ll just have people sign up on 10/31 and then cancel before I get billed” are going to have to work a little harder.
  6. What if two or more people have the same number of sign-ups?
    1. It proves Artie has the shittiest luck in History. Seriously we’ll do a random drawing.

By participating in the contest, contestants hereby agree to be bound by the below terms, rules and restrictions, and further agree that Artie Lang, Too Fat to Fish, Inc., all other affiliated companies (hereafter individually and collectively, “Company”) and each of their respective partners, officers, directors, employees, representatives and agents (all of the foregoing, individually and collectively, “Company Parties”) shall have no liability for, and shall be held harmless for and against, any damage, loss or injury that may arise in whole or in part, directly or indirectly, from the acceptance, possession, use or misuse of any prizes hereunder (and any travel related hereto) or participation in this contest.  Company makes no warranty, representation or guarantee, express or implied, in fact or in law, relative to the use of prize or any travel awarded.

The 1st Prize winner will receive $3,000 and a trip to Hoboken, New Jersey to attend a live taping of one episode of Artie Lang’s podcast.  

The 2nd prize winner will receive $1,000 and a trip to Hoboken, New Jersey to attend a live taping of one episode of Artie Lang’s podcast.  

The 3rd prize winner will receive $1,000.

The winners will be announced on November 2, 2015.

If a trip prize is awarded, prize includes round-trip, coach class air transportation for the winner from a major commercial airport within the continental United States near winner’s residence or location to Hoboken, a single occupancy standard hotel room, and ground transportation to and from the airport.  Selection of airline and hotel are solely within Company’s discretion. Meals, gratuities, luggage fees, incidental hotel charges and any other travel-related expenses are the sole responsibility of winner. Exact travel dates and arrangements shall be mutually determined by Company and the winner and subject to availability. Winner must have all necessary identification and/or travel documents required for travel. Airline tickets are non-refundable/non-transferable, and are not valid for upgrades and/or frequent flyer miles. Company will not obtain or provide travel insurance or any other form of insurance.  Prizes are not redeemable for cash or exchangeable for another prize. Any changes to completed travel arrangements, once booked, are the sole responsibility of the winner, and are solely at the winner’s expense. All other costs and expenses related to prize acceptance and use, not specified herein as being provided, are the sole responsibility of winner(s). Conditions and restrictions may apply. All prizes must be redeemed on a timely basis as required by Company.

Winners are responsible for all applicable taxes and surcharges for all prizes.

All potential winners are subject to verification by the company. In order for a contestant to receive credit for bringing in a new subscriber, each new subscriber must purchase a subscription in advance for a minimum of three months. The Company reserves at its sole discretion the right to choose an alternative winner in the event that that a potential winner has been disqualified or is deemed ineligible. If a winner cannot be contacted, is found to be ineligible or is disqualified for any reason, including, without limitation, for failing to comply with contest rules, the Company reserves the right to determine an alternate winner or not to award the prize, at its sole discretion.

All contestants and winners agree that Company (and its licensees/assignees) may use their  names, photographs, likenesses, and voices for advertising and promotional purposes without compensation or other consideration.

Company is not responsible for late, lost, damaged or stolen luggage. The Company is not responsible for any travel delays, flight cancellations or difficulty. If travel delays, cancellations or difficulty prevent arrival in time for any and all elements of trip, the Company is not responsible for awarding any compensation in lieu thereof.

As a condition of participating in the contest, participants agree (and agree to confirm in writing): (a) under no circumstances will contestant be permitted to obtain awards for, and contestant hereby waives all rights to claim, punitive, incidental, consequential, or any other damages, other than for actual out-of-pocket expenses in the event of any breach by Company of Company’s obligations or otherwise with regard to Company’s acts or omissions in connection with the contest or otherwise; (b) any and all claims, judgments, and award shall be limited to actual out-of-pocket costs incurred, excluding attorneys’ fees and costs; and (c) any disputes against Company shall be determined by binding arbitration in Hoboken, New Jersey. All contestants and all winners agree to defend and indemnify the Company Parties from and against all claims arising from the actions and omissions of the contestants and winners, and  BY ACCEPTING PRIZE, WINNERS ACCEPT THE INHERENTLY DANGEROUS NATURE AND RISK IN ANY TRAVEL OR TRANSPORTATION (INCLUDING FLYING), SUCH RISK INCLUDING PERSONAL INJURY AND/OR DEATH, ACKNOWLEDGES THAT HIS/HER PARTICIPATION IN THE PRIZE EVENT IS VOLUNTARY, ACKNOWLEDGES THAT THERE ARE NATURAL FACTORS AND OCCURRENCES WHICH MAY IMPACT ON OR AFFECT THE SAFETY OF THE ACTIVITIES HE/SHE IS PARTICIPATING IN AND HE/SHE ASSUMES THE RISK OF SUCH FACTORS AND OCCURRENCES AND AGREES THAT COMPANY AND COMPANY PARTIES SHALL NOT BE IN ANY WAY RESPONSIBLE FOR ANY RESULTING INJURY AND/OR DEATH.

Company, in its sole discretion, reserves the right to disqualify and prohibit from participating any person who Company determines (in its sole discretion) is or is attempting to: (i) tamper with any aspect of the contest or the website; (ii) attempting to undermine the legitimate operation of the contest by cheating, deception, or other unfair playing practices, (iii) intending to annoy, abuse, threaten or harass any other contestants or any of the Company Parties; and/or (iv) otherwise violating the contest rules.

This contest is subject to all federal, state, municipal laws and regulations and is void where prohibited. The contest is open to anyone throughout the world who is 21 years of age or older.

Winning a prize is contingent upon entrant’s fulfillment of all requirements set forth therein.

Come back and enjoy a month free!

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